DevaTree Blog

Support for Hellish Times

Posted By Tamika on Mar 19, 2019

If you’re going through any kind of pain—physical, mental, emotional, spiritual—it’s going to eventually end.

I promise.

We’ve all been there, trudging our way through complicated, lonely, heartbreaking situations, thinking our dark fate is forever. Unchecked, our fear gets loud and obnoxious, telling us we’re doomed beyond imagination.

But this particular fear is a liar.  

In hellish times, we need two things:

  1. Big picture perspective, so we don’t lose faith in the future;
  2. On-the-ground (quick and easy) momentum that gets us through the hardest moments so we don’t abandon our life.

1. Big Picture Help:

Everything changes—it’s metaphysical law.

When you notice yourself thinking there’s no way out, or feeling life is beyond repair, call out this insane fear (some fears are legit, but not this one). Calling its bluff can soothe our spirit so we don’t lose faith in the future.

Even that marble countertop we’re so proud of, will someday start to erode.

Thankfully, we humans are not made of marble. We’re made of flesh, bone and blood, and our turnaround time during a crisis is much faster than marble.

Even when we think we’re stuck, from a universal perspective, we’re still evolving. We just don’t see the invisible “achievements” occurring underneath our pain.

2. Help for the Daily Grind:

In dark periods, we’ve got to keep moving. Clean something. Go for the smallest walk. Cook a meal. Listen to a podcast. Do a silly little yoga pose—forget big goals for now. Even if you’re bedridden, you can do a breath practice, stretch, or write in a journal.

The idea is to keep energy flowing.

Even the smallest action can move energy.

If you’re an achiever, type-A personality, leader, or go-getter, these low periods will be especially daunting—you’re used to bold, brave steps forward. Understand that the unseen work (happening beneath the surface of your worldly personality) takes precedence now. Build appreciation for the inner transformation because when it’s over, you’ll be more effective and balanced than ever before. Softening is key.

If you’re a teacher, counselor, healer, peace-keeper, or light-worker, the dark night of the soul can make you question everything you know and teach. My dear, you can be so hard on yourself. Every healer has been wounded, and sometimes the more initiations, the more real we become with our students and clients. There’s nothing more annoying than a spiritual guide who has never stood in the fire. Your innocence is being traded for wisdom. You are not a fraud; you’re human like everyone else. Standing tall is key.

Have you gone through impossibly dark times, and what did you learn? I’d love to hear from you, in the comments below. Your words could help someone who feels alone and stuck.

Grateful we’re in this together.

Love you,

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8 Comment(s)

Hasana on March 19, 2019
It’s so hard to see the lesson when you’re in the dark. I learned two things in my most recent struggle, simplify things and don’t try to go it alone. When I was in the thick of it I didn’t even know what to ask for so my prayer simply became “help” I also realized by sharing my struggle and giving it an actual voice, it immediately lessened the powerful grip it had on me.
Tamika on March 19, 2019
Hasana, these suggestions are so wise. And giving voice to our struggle does loosen the grip, doesn't it. Thank you so much for sharing. xx
Cindy on March 21, 2019
I guess one of the things I think I have learned is that I don't have to go it alone, that sharing is not putting a burden on those that care about me. Another thing that I learned is how to stand up for myself, set boundaries, put my sword in the earth and simply say no. No explanation required.
Tamika on March 22, 2019
Oh Cindy, that sword in the earth is the most powerful (and sometimes painful) thing to do—but so worth it. Saluting you, dear One. xo
Jeannie on March 21, 2019
For me it was dark for over ten years, a dark comfort of self hatred and self abuse without any epiphanies that let in the light. Then for me it started slowly 5 minutes of meditation a week, then a day, then I was looking for the light. I found it with YTT and it opened windows so wide and so fast that sometimes I tried to close them due to my fear, sometimes I still do . My new friends helped me share my truthaches, and suddenly I was sharing my pain and my stains and I understood that my shame was my pain. Now I share my shame, and my pain lessens and my inner power grows. Burying my shame and self hatred was like burying a family member that I could never grieve for. Share! Tell your truth! And tell your truthaches!
Tamika on March 22, 2019
Jeannie, your unfolding is so beautiful to everyone who gets to witness it. Your words could change the world. So much love,
Kaytlyn on April 04, 2019
I so appreciate your article. Simple and SO true. And in Ontario, and likely in many places, this winter has really dragged us deep into the dark. It's hard to know that we are not loosing it. It feels like there is no way out in many ways, financially, in finding soul of place, and in finding community. This work means too much time alone.
Tamika on May 22, 2019
Kaytlyn, I hope that long winter has been replaced by some sunshine. You're so brave to share—and I and so many others can resonate with your words. Thank you.

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