DevaTree Blog

I’m in an open relationship

Posted By Carolyn on Nov 07, 2018

I’m a woman of multiple passions and interests, so it can be hard for me to commit. On any given day, my heart knows what it wants—and it needs space to express itself openly and freely. It’s important for me to live in the moment, opening myself to my passions and desires as they arise.

I’m a dancer, artist, mother, creator—and I love my gypsy ways. I won’t be tied down.

Still, when I love, I love deeply and fully.

My heart is unguarded. When it’s time for a rendezvous with my beloved, I’m present, open, and ready. 

Right now, this love is perfect for me—because we want the same things.

I’m in an open relationship—with yoga.

We don’t put demands on each other, no lofty promises for the future. We meet up when the impulse hits.

And when it does, we breathe and sweat and cry and relax together. In those moments, we are one. And those moments are all we have.

As a solo parent raising two teenage girls and working full time, I don’t want someone telling me I have to do a 90-minute class every day. It’s too restrictive.

That’s not to say I don’t miss yoga when we’ve been apart—I have needs like anyone else! On those days of longing, I walk past my mat and pretend I can’t see it.

I’m in love, but sometimes there are too many other things to do.

I’m okay with that. And so is yoga.

We’re committed. We’re secure in each other.

Yoga’s so open it doesn’t mind if I choose dancing over downward dog. If I decide to go for a walk instead, it says ‘hey I’ll be here when you get home.’

It may sound radical, but if Pilates was my jam, yoga would be fine with me spending hours dedicated to all the fine details.

It wouldn’t care one bit; yoga’s not prone to insecurity.

If I desert my mat for a few days, when I come back yoga thinks nothing of it. There’s no nagging, begging, guilt-trip, jealousy, or ‘where have you been?’

If I only have 15 minutes to practice, yoga understands. If I want breath practices one day, restorative the next, and a strong vinyasa flow tomorrow, yoga’s up for anything. It just wants me to be happy.

This is the beauty of my open relationship.

Thank you, yoga. I’m committed to you.

Just not all the time!

Carolyn Jyoti

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18 Comment(s)

Katherine on November 07, 2018
Thank you for this. I am a teacher of 14 years, and I still catch myself berating & disciplining myself for not reaching unreasonable standards of how much I should practice to be a "real" yogi, or a "real" teacher. I work full time, teach part time, & have side businesses. Time is literally limited, because I choose these other things as well. And yoga always welcomes me back. So the issue is clearly on my end. Thank you for the reminder that yoga will meet me where I am.
Carolyn Jyoti on November 07, 2018
Katherine, isn't it interesting the expectations we put on ourselves as yoga teachers? I love how yoga will always be there for us, waiting patiently and welcoming us as we are!
Laura F Pereverzoff-Ong on November 07, 2018
Love this Carolyn! So good for me to hear. Going for a swim. Love you too.
Carolyn Jyoti on November 07, 2018
Hi Laura, Love you too!!! xox
Colleen on November 07, 2018
Hi Carolyn, I truly love this. Yesterday I had a 2-hour conference call. My plan was for a nice yoga practice beforehand. But I needed to dance, so that’s what happened instead. ????????????
Carolyn Jyoti on November 08, 2018
Hi Colleen, Dancing is incredible! This is fabulous. xo
Kaitlin on November 07, 2018
Aaah SO true. Thank you for the reminder! Love this
Carolyn Jyoti on November 08, 2018
Love you Kaitlin!
Shelley Myer on November 07, 2018
I Love this so much. It is exactly how I feel about yoga.
Carolyn Jyoti on November 08, 2018
Shay <3 We all can love yoga in this way!
Hasana on November 07, 2018
I’m so glad your relationship is open with no jealousy because I have also been seeing yoga on and off for some time now! ☀️????????
Mandara on November 07, 2018
You've got something there Jyoti Ma! The truth of the matter is you've said something that I couldn't / wouldn't say so eloquently and daringly. I would welcome being your mat and have you play your yoga on me at anytime.
Carolyn Jyoti on November 08, 2018
Hasana, I love 'sharing' yoga with you too! xo
Helen Bundy on November 10, 2018
I just love this
Stephanie on November 14, 2018
I love this! I've gotten over the guilt I used to feel because I don't get on my mat every day because I figure if I'm doing what I'm doing with awareness, and attention to my breath, whether it be walking or dancing or sitting, it's yoga! there's so much more to yoga than what we do on the mat...
Stephanie on November 14, 2018
I loved every word of this.. and it inspires me.
Lisa Moore on November 20, 2018
I finally took the opportunity to read this...and it resonates. Thank you Carolyn Jyoti!
Nicole Brown on March 19, 2019
Love this piece Carolyn! What a fun and impactful read. Just what I needed in this moment. Thank you.

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